A coke bust? No, it's fake salt (industrial salt passing for table salt). I LOVE this story. My uncle already told me about these kinds of scams going on it China, but here it is again. It's almost as entertaining as the recurrent Taiwanese parliamentary full-on rumbles.
I remember drinking KLIM as a child, which was a cheapo Taiwanese rip off for powered milk (KLIM for the slow-witted is milk spelled backwards).
This "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" rip off is pretty funny too (the Chinese by the way makes the proud claim that it is "Made in Taiwan").
OK, so I stayed up until 4am the other night watching the entire season of Californication (yes, I have obsessive compulsive behavioral patterns). I love David Duchovny, he is a genius (oh, I used the word again). Very nearly Doctor Duchovny - Yale English, but dropped his PhD thesis on 'Magic and Technology in Contemporary Poetry and Prose' to be an extra in Working Girl. How's that for stupid trivia.
For TV online see SURF; for Asian soaps, movies, MVs, etc. there's crunchyroll. TVs are so last millenium.
Wong Kar-wai and Clive Owen. These were the good days before Blueberry Nights and the big Hollywood sellout (WKW signed on with Fox after all...). The other night someone complained to me that British men either look like Ricky Gervais in The Office or are prone to premature balding. Yes, but then there is Clive Owen who redeems everyone concerned. This was a BMW ad he made with Forest Whitaker and post-plastic surgery Mickey Rourke, the music is the fantastic song Unicorno sung by Charly Garcia Y Mercedes Sosa.
HOW can I NOT post this up in my memory palace? Al Gore may have won the Nobel, but this takes the cake! While the world was busy in 2001 with other less important things, Yatta was getting the word out on saving the enviornment. (How different the world might have been if the US Supreme Court had done a better job arbitrating the 2000 Presidential Elections).
I seem to recall that Daniel Wu had a rant about big sunglasses on his blog, well my fashion gripe is low riders on bodies without proper waistlines, which result in the so-called (and so-appropriately-called) 'muffin top' look. Wear clothes (and sunglasses) that fit you! Well, good news from BBC, low riders and crack dealers are finally out.
'Virtual theft' leads to arrest Habbo Hotel users create a character and can buy furniture A Dutch teenager has been arrested for allegedly stealing virtual furniture from "rooms" in Habbo Hotel, a 3D social networking website. The 17-year-old is accused of stealing 4,000 euros (£2,840) worth of virtual furniture, bought with real money. Five 15-year-olds have also been questioned by police, who were contacted by the website's owners. The six teenagers are suspected of moving the stolen furniture into their own Habbo rooms.'
Surely they can just put this kid in a Habbo Prison for his offence? And who the heck thought of the name Habbo Hotel? It sounds like Hobo Hotel meets Asbo Hotel...
Love him, hate him, he's the Governator. Today it's mostly hoorays for the former Mr Olympia, Conan, and Terminator. He's leading the State of California in a law suit against Bush's government:
'California sued the federal government on Thursday to force a decision about whether the state can impose the first greenhouse gas emission standards for cars and light trucks in the United States. More than a dozen other states are poised to follow California's lead if it is granted the waiver from federal law, presenting a challenge to automakers who would have to adapt to a patchwork of regulations. "Our position is that it's time for EPA to either act or get out of the way," said Lee Moore, a spokesman for New Jersey Attorney General Anne Milgram.' (International Herald Tribune)
He's become one of the most 'post-partisan' politician in current US politics. Plus he does great commercials in Japan for all sorts of crap (especially energy drinks):
Films seen: The Great World of Sound Great film about con men and the music industry. Mister Lonely Good and bad; good includes image on right. I'm Not There Speechless, will find words later. El Otro Argentinian new wave, fantastic. Back to Normandy The French director was a self-indulgent, pretentious git. The Champagne Spy The Israeli director was a self-indulgent, pretentious git. Stars/Copacabana Documentary made from a script. Julio Arrieta is great as the voice of the shantytowns.
Moral of this festival: Don't let the director speak in a Q&A if he's a self-indulgent, pretentious git, it's a disappointment and ruins the film.
Not that it's not fun to watch the US dollar being reduced to Monopoly money in the world markets, but when Brazilian supermodels start spewing crap about economics, you know the end is near. Gisele Bundchen should be thanking her President for his reforms... uh, Vice-President Cheney, isn't that Hugo Chavez?
Indulging in my love for kitsch, here's some news from the C-Pop front: Vic Zhou of now extinct boy band F4 fame has a new single 'I'm Not F4', which is SO bad I think F4 is glad he's not F4 (BTW - I cannot believe Jay Chou wrote this song and what's with C-Pop, big sweaters, and fingerless leather driving gloves?!). I once watched ALL of Meteor Garden 1 and 2 in rapid succession as background distraction while trying to make a deadline for work. 2am, 3am, and even 4am marathons later, all the work was done, my eyes were little squares, and my brain turned to Nutrasweet. The Japanese version Hana Yori Dango is much better.
New Pants, Goodbye Disco (Inexplicably in English, fantastically low-budget chic). Convenience Store, Silent Day (which sounded like 'Saturday' the first 10 times I heard it).
Also: SUPER VC (I could only find this fan vid on Youtube) And the now defunct band The Dada and Peng Tan's solo album Teen Spirit.
Thanks to my Super Sleuth Mom for the link: you can download these at Baidu - PC users beware of viruses and get a freaking Mac).
"Madame Tussauds was forced to withdraw the models just a day after the Ocean's Thirteen attraction opened on Thursday. Clooney's cheeks had to be retouched when fans left a trail of lipstick marks and Pitt's squeezable bottom was fixed after enduring too many pinches".
"While criticising Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, Mr Cheney said 'the people of Peru deserve better'. Speaking in Dallas, Texas, he said he did not believe Mr Chavez represented the future of Latin America. Mr Chavez and his socialist ideology have long concerned US President George W Bush's administration. Mr Cheney said of the Venezuelan leader: 'He spends a great deal of his time worrying about us and criticising the United States'. He added: 'The people of Peru, I think, deserve better in their leadership. But that's obviously a matter they've got to resolve for themselves'. He made the faux pas on Friday while addressing a lunch meeting of the Dallas-based World Affairs Council, which describes itself as an organisation set up to educate citizens on international affairs." (see video on BBC)
LOL... wait until Cheney finds out Alberto Fujimori is of Japanese ethnicity, he might just shoot someone in the face again.
This is a belated post rounding up things I saw at the Venice Film Festival (the oldest of its kind), more later on the less exhilirating art Biennale...
SE, JEI (LUST, CAUTION) by Ang Lee (USA/China/Taiwan, China, 156’, language: Mandarin, subt. Italian/English) cast: Tony Leung, Joan Chen, Tang Wei double billed with SLEUTH by Kenneth Branagh (UK/USA, 86’, language: English, subt. Italian) cast: Michael Caine, Jude Law
CAUTION, this film is full of LUST. I glimpsed Ang Lee and his actors on the red carpet going in for the Gala Screening and thought how boring it must be to have to watch yourself in a film a gajillion times at every festival across the world. It'd be like reading your own book a million times. But Venice is one of the biggies so I guess they can't scive off like they usually do once the lights have gone down in the cinema (or maybe they did, there is a nice bar in the theatre).
It must be so weird to be Tony Leung and walk down the red carpet in a beautifully pressed tux only to sit in a room with a bunch of strangers watching you watch yourself butt naked on screen. Gorgeous film full of qipaos, mahjong rings, pretty faces, nice view of nipples, testicles, and other usually uncinematic body parts (thankfully no Hollywood-styled pointed toe climax scenes). Joan Chen acted everyone out of the house.
The best review I heard for it was from this old Italian dude sitting in front of me at the screening who said to his two friends: 'I heard there's loads of sex in this movie' to which the other guy said 'yes, but not for the first hour and a half.' The second best review was from a friend in Prague who saw it later and wrote to we 'We have seen Ang Lee's "Lust, Caution" lately and that reminded me of my long-standing wish to learn mahjong, I hope I will get one for Christmas and we can play next time.' Yes, the film was WAY too long and you have to really love the visuals to not start thinking about random things like 'should I buy a mahjong set for Xmas?' - watch the trailer, which is beautifully edited.
It won the Lion (second for AL after Brokeback Mountain). It's no surprise, Shanghai in the 30s is the most lucrative cinematic cliche going at the moment, not to mention the jury was led by Zhang Yimou and also had lust-aficionados Paul Verhoeven (whose own 'erotic spy thriller' Black Book bombed earlier in the year at the cinemas) and Catherine Breillat (whose would-be feminist 'I am a hole' film Romance is all about sex - get a load of her promo photos... embarrassingly lacking in any avant-gardist legitimacy). Oh, not to mention festival guru Marco Mueller has a thing for Asians evidenced by his kow-tow before Zhang Ziyi at the 2006 festival.
Incidentally, v good to see Wang Leehom doing good after those early MVs:
Leehom really looks the part! OK, OK, different flag, different ideology - this is a Communist 'must liberate Taiwan' poster on the right, but it's the same visual rhetoric as the Nationalist stuff.
LUST, CAUTION was double billed with SLEUTH (2007), which is a remake of SLEUTH (1972) starring Michael Caine as the victim of Laurence Olivier's older geezer. Here Caine plays the older geezer and the younger geezer is now played by Jude Law (formerly played by Caine). Wink wink, nod nod - Jude Law also plays Caine's character in the god awful 2004 remake of ALFIE (1966).
I'M NOT THERE by Todd Haynes (USA, 135’, language: English, subt. Italian) cast: Richard Gere, Cate Blanchett, Heath Ledger, Julianne Moore, Christian Bale, Charlotte Gainsbourg double billed with IL DOLCE E L'AMARO by Andrea Porporati (Italy, 98’ language: Italian, subt. English) cast: Luigi Lo Cascio, Donatella Finocchiaro, Fabrizio Gifuni, Tony Gambino
This was THE highlight of the festival and I have to say of cinema so far in the 21st century. WTF has everybody else been doing for the past 7 years?! Too much to say so will save for London Film Festival post where I saw it again. Todd Haynes is a genius and I never use that bogus, cliched word. More entertaining and less challenging to write about right now is the dreadful IL DOLCE E L'AMARO whose writers and directors should be thoroughly thrashed for making me sit through this lame-o rip off of every mafia movie cliche in the history of cinema. The imprisoned mafia hero tells his son who visits him in jail: 'In life my son there is sweet and there is bitter', mostly bitter after you see this film. Undoubtedly the only way it would be seen was to double bill it with I'm Not There. I include the film poster here just to give an idea of how crappy this film is. No, it's not sideways, it was designed that way.
NIGHTWATCHING by Peter Greenaway (UK/Poland/Canada/ Netherlands, 134’, language: English, subt. Italian) cast: Martin Freeman, Emily Holmes, Eva Birthistle, Jodhi May, Michael Teigen double billed with L'ORA DI PUNTA by Vincenzo Marra (Italy, 96, language: Italian, subt. English) cast: Fanny Ardant, Michele Lastella, Giulia Bevilacqua
Martin Freeman as Rembrandt makes up for the fact that Peter Greenaway is still making the same film he's always made. Check out the artist and the actor, the before and after.
L'ORA DI PUNTA was so bad even the Italian audience boo'ed it after the screening. Really. I felt bad for Fanny Ardant who is always so charming, but she was actually delusional enough to compare the director of this ocular travesty to legendary French filmmaker Robert Bresson! It was either strained PR or she really is incapable of sound judgment and gets what she deserves. Booooo. I love Italian audiences, there's no holding back. It was that bad. It made IL DOLCE E L'AMARO look good that's how bad this was. Not a good showing for Italian film (otherwise exciting and very healthy at the moment).
Two documentaries from the festival that I saw:
WUYONG (USELESS) by Jia Zhangke (China, 80’, language: Chinese/Shanxi, subt. Italian/English) cast: Ma Ke Slow paced doc by hot-new-thing Jia Zhangke (whose STILL LIFE won the Lion in 2006). Couldn't tell though if he was laughing with or at the designer featured in the film.
ANDARILHO by Cao Guimarães (Brazil, 80’, language: Portuguese, subt. Italian/English) Even slower paced art film about the travels of different men on the same Brazilian highway. Really good and gives you an insight into the existence of these men, but requires patience.
AND that my dears was this year's Venice film festival (I was there to work in the Marciana afterall). Movies I missed:
JIANG Wen Taiyang zhaochang shengqi (The Sun Also Rises) - China / Hong Kong, China, 116’ Jiang Wen, Joan Chen, Zhou Yun, Jaycee Chan, Anthony Wong
LEE Kang Sheng (LI Kangsheng) Bangbang wo aishen (Help Me Eros) - Taiwan, 107’ Lee Kang Sheng, Yin Shin
KITANO Takeshi Kantoku banzai! (Glory to the Filmmaker!) - Japan, 104’ “Beat” Takeshi Kitano, Tohru Emori, Kayoko Kishimoto, Anne Suzuki, Kazuko Yoshiyuki
Alexi TAN Tiantang kou (Blood Brothers) - China / Taiwan, China / Hong Kong, China, 95’, Daniel Wu Zhang Zhen, Shu Qi, Sun Honglei - I had to go to dinner with a friend that night and friends are more important than seeing Daniel Wu (though you can check out his blog photos from the red carpet).
AOYAMA Shinji Sad Vacation - Japan, 136’ Tadanobu Asano, Aoi Miyazaki, Joe Odagiri, Ken Mitsuishi
Julian SCHNABEL Lou Reed's BERLIN - USA, 85’ Lou Reed, Emmanuelle Seigner
The Men Who Look Like Kenny Rogers site is just too funny not to post. The creators seem to be supporters for Senator John Edwards. Pity he doesn't look like Kenny Rogers or go for a KR makeover. Is anyone going to tell the Senator "ya gotta know when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, and know when to run."
So here we go, first blog entry. Well, not really. I had another one way back when, but I forgot the account name and it's probably lost in some black hole with a bunch of abandonned Second Life avatars sitting around doing nothing in that thing we used to call cyberspace.
Welcome to my memory palace. I was going to call this blog CHISEEN to collect all the crazy things I don't want to forget that I've come across and that are sent to me, but someone actually got to it first. The funny thing is that someone is Daniel Wu who is a truly worthy person to lose a blog title to. Ironic. He even had the same photo from the Venice Biennale that I took this September.
First things first: get yourself a Wu-Name (no relation to Daniel Wu, but the irony here is not lost): Wu-Name Generator.
A coke bust? No, it's fake salt (industrial salt passing for table salt). I LOVE this story. My uncle already told me about these kinds of scams going on it China, but here it is again. It's almost as entertaining as the recurrent Taiwanese parliamentary full-on rumbles.
